Yes I survived the night. From sleeping with one eye closed, and constant shaking, no one has come for me yet. These tales will continue until I am stopped. (Evil laugh) Where were we? Awww yes. Conspiracy Theories. Yes this next one…
Conspiracy Theory #4. The Demise Of Jim Harbaugh 49ers
This conspiracy is a fun one. We have to go back and go through some history before we continue and elaborate. Trent Baalke (our current punk ass GM) Was promoted on 1/5/11 and 2 days later he announced that Stanford Football coach Jim Harbaugh would have the keys to drive the 49ers.
Our punk ass owner and crybaby Jed York was going to “Clean House” and make changes. Jim Harbaugh took over The San Francisco 49ers on 1/7/11. as head coach. Prior to the 2011 season (the 2010 season) the San Francisco 49ers finished 8-8. Mike Singletary was fired after the heartbreaking loss to the the St. Louis Rams a day after Xmas. Rumors had swirl for years of Mike Singletary’s lack of offensive execution as a head coach in the NFL. With the roster we had at the time, it was not a championship-esq roster but definitely a playoff worthy one. Defensively no one can ever question what this man did for the 49ers. Offensively, you can open Pandora’s box with these questions. Many questionable moves, being too conservative, not opening up the playbook etc were always the focal points in the local media and fans alike. Enter Jim Harbaugh.
Harbaugh immediately was a fan favorite here in 49er lore. Not only was he not nervous to have the keys to the illustrious franchise, he vowed to make sure his players played hard. And that’s exactly what happened. Let’s start with the 2011 draft and 2011 offseason moves to get a clearer picture, shall we? No? Okay well I’m going to do it anyways. Ha.
1. Trent Baalke gets promoted from Vice President of Basketball Operations to GM. If you recall Scot McCloughan was our GM prior to that but unfortunately him and the 49ers agreed to part ways in 2010 due to personal issues.
2. 2011 Draft.
7th overall pick was Aldon Smith, 36th Overall Colin Kaepernick, 80th overall Chris Culliver, 115th overall Kendall Hunter, 153rd overall Daniel Kilgore, 182nd overall Ronald Johnson (*Released during preseason), 190th pick overall Colin Jones, 211th overall Bruce Miller, 239th overall Mike Pearson & 250th overall Curtis Holcomb (Curtis was a Supplementary Compensation Pick never playing a down for the 49ers). That is a good crop of draftees right.
3. 2011 Free Agency signings.
The following players were resigned in 2011 as current free agents: Alex Smith, Ray McDonald, Dashon Goldson, & CJ Spillman. David Akers, Jonathan Goodwin, Carlos Rogers, Donte Whitner, & Braylon Edwards were all signed from other teams.
Get back on the Bandwagon. Yes a lot of 49ers fan jumped off at this time. Little did they know that we would go on to win 10 of our first 12 games, including an impressive 8 game win streak headlined by that amazing defense. The 49ers would finish that season 13-3. A fairy tale season for all. Set an NFL Record for fewest turnovers in a season. David Akers set an NFL record for most FGM & FGA in a season ( He went 44 of 52). Also it was noted that during the Week 15 game on 12/19/11 against the Pittsburgh Steelers the power went out twice at Candlestick Park. The 49ers were on their way back to the promise land. Sending 9 players to the pro bowl and having 6 all pro players, the 2011 San Francisco 49ers were honestly kicking some ass. “Who’s got it better than us?” Was Jim Harbaugh’s patent quote. The 49ers clinched the NFC West and would have home field advantage throughout the playoffs.