Sigh. Well No coupons. No snacks. Arrrrgggghhhh. Anyways this movie was terrible. I mean really bad. Like I fell asleep bad. And the movie critics love this movie. 

Keanu Reeves plays John Wick, an Ex-Hitman who is allegedly out of the game. That is until he receives a blood oath coin from the organization. The head of this organization is an Italian Mafia boss named Santino D’Antoni  (Riccardo Scamarcio). Wick must perform a kill unless due to the rules of the organizations rules. The target? Gianni D’Antoni  (Claudia Gerini). Yes the sister of Santino. 

This movie is not worth doing a full review on. Reeves is slow, out of shape, fat, and ill timed. His acting is terrible and he keeps doing the same arm bar to take down the bad guys over and over. What kind of a hitman is loud? He can’t run, he’s incompetent, he has no personality nor screen presence at all. It’s like that Dave Chappelle skit where he’s making fun of the Matrix. And Keanu Reeves is clueless saying “Dude you totally got me.” Even Laurence Fishburne appearance couldn’t save this. 

Please this isn’t worth watching on an airplane, bootleg, stream, tv, HBO, DVD, vhs, betamax do not watch it. You’d be better off snuggling with Ron Jeremy. Hahahahhahahaah

I give this movie an F-